Diddy Kong Grows Up

DK & Diddy

FOML2 was born in 1990 - my firstborn male son. The Nintendo game Donkey Kong Country came out in 1994. I always saw myself as Donkey Kong "DK", and my son as Diddy. DK was bigger, wiser and more powerful, Diddy was fast and agile, and looked cute in a cap. So did my boy, who I had already affectionately nicknamed "Monkeyboy".

The object of Donkey Kong was to move through the game, fighting off bad guys, and enduring challenges. All while staying on the course, and gathering as many prizes, and as much strength as you could to enhance your life.  Yes, it is true: This earth life is a lot like Donkey Kong Country - with less bongo drums.

Minecart Madness

However, sometime during the past decade, Diddy has gradually evolved into DK, and I have morphed into Cranky Kong. I don't know when or how it happened, but it did.

Cranky Kong

FOML#2 has become a man. He returned from serving a faithful mission. He is strong, he is dedicated. He is now pursuing his education and working. He is on the right minecart track. I could not be more proud.

So what is a returned missionary to do?  Yep. He found himself a girlfriend. Wait! Not just a girlfriend - a fiancée! And not just any fiancée, an amazing, wonderful good, kind, smart, funny beautiful, righteous fiancée!. And we couldn't be happier - and neither could they.

Diddy & Dixie

This is the first wedding of the 5 MMM offspring.  My EC is making a list for a bridal shower invitations as we speak.  I am busy pretending to listen to her read it.  It is a grand adventure for all of us.  And what makes it great is that we adore this girl. We know our son is a "catch", but we are very aware that she is a "catch" as well. 

But as a parent you worry...you wonder how much of what you tried to instill in your kids has really sunk in. Some you can see, some you can feel. You witness the growth of their testimonies, their work ethic, their own standards and values - and we like what we see. 

We know that they are madly in love. Goofy in love - and it is adorable. We see how they treat each other, and it reassures us. But something has happened since they have been together that gives us an insight into their relationship that few engaged couples experience.

Both "Diddy" and "Dixie" have brought some precarious health conditions with them into their relationship. Concerns that would cause many to slam on the brakes and reassess - before figuring out colors and punch recipes.  Not these two. They are pressing forward with their newly found love, as well as the faith that they both already possessed. Together, it is stronger, and inspiring.

My pending daughter-in-law was recently hospitalized for a surgery. (She is doing great.) As my EC and I were walking out of the hospital, I mentioned that this young couple is grappling with the kinds of decisions and challenges that usually don't crop up until well after the wedding. And they are waltzing though them with grace.

The thing that touches my heart is the honor of watching and learning what kind of husband my son will be - before the wedding. I watched as he pronounced a priesthood blessing on her head - as her wise father stepped aside to allow him the opportunity.  I have watched as he has put every other element of his life on hold, so that he could have a singular focus on his future wife's comfort and well-being. He puts her first.

As he doted on her in the hospital - feeding her, giving her drinks, calling for the nurse, tucking in her blanket, kissing her forehead - My EC and I both felt the gentle reassurance in our hearts that he will be an honorable, loving husband and father. We consider that foreknowledge a precious gift.

As she came out of anesthesia, the first named that crossed her lips was that of my son. The way she looks at him, worries about him, and cares for him - gives us the same reassurance that her heart, her focus, and her priorities have already turned towards him. 

If they always put each other's needs first, they will always retain the magic that they are already experiencing, and the sealing they are soon to receive in the holy temple.

We are proud of our Monkeyboy.

And our Monkeygirl.

Surviving the Whirlpool

Note:  This is the last of a three-part post on "Spiritual Stupidity", or how we can get pulled down into personal apostasy.  The first post is here, the second here.  I imagine that this post would be a lot better if you read those first. Or if you have some chips to snack on as you read it.


Also:  Richard G. Scott tackled this topic back in 1990 in a manner far better than I ever could. Here is the link to his talk "Finding the Way Back." Read it!

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For the sake of discussion, let's say I ignored all of the wisdom and counsel of God and his representatives and did not avoid the whirlpool. Yes, I flirted with danger, and now find myself sucked down into the a place where the Spirit did not follow me. I am left to my own devices, and the only voices I seem to hear are the ones lying to me that I have done the right thing.

I failed at avoidance...now it's about survival. How do I survive? How do I climb back out into the sunlight?

And what if I don't even realize that I am in trouble?

The Zoramites of Alma's day had fallen away from the church. There were two groups - the wealthy ones who were puffed up with pride (Alma 31:24-28), and the poor ones who were "forced" to be humble (Alma 32:2-3). Alma and his missionaries found that some of the poorer Zoramites were humble enough to be teachable. So Alma jumped in and began to teach them.

And what did he teach?  Alma 32.  Need help? I'll give you a hint:  Scripture Chase Alma 32:21. Too old? How about Scripture Mastery Alma 32:21? That's right!  Alma taught about faith.  Faith? To apostates?

And now as I have said concerning faith - faith is not to have a perfect knowledge of things; therefore if ye have faith ye hope for things which are not seen, which are true. (Alma 32:21)

Why would Alma first teach people that are experiencing personal apostasy about faith? Wouldn't he be teaching them about prophets, or scriptures, or even the Savior, or how about just calling them to repentance?  Why faith?

Because being in the whirlpool is a crisis of faith. Not a crisis of knowledge, or a crisis of belief. Personal apostasy is a crisis of faith. It is giving up our hope in the things we cannot see. In fact, many who find themselves in the whirlpool are there because they think they have found "knowledge" that supplants their need for faith.

To make it easier to understand, just listen...

I can't see how a loving God would let so many bad things happen.
I can't see how Joseph Smith could possibly be a real prophet.
I can't see how the true church would oppose gay marriage.
I can't see how the true church would deny women the priesthood.
I can't see why I should have to go to a church every week.
I can't see any tangible evidence of the Book of Mormon.

You can't see.  We got it.  That is the POINT of faith.

The difference is what follows any of these statements - and the way we respond shows a lot about where we are in the whirlpool. If we lack faith we say:  I can't see any proof that Joseph Smith saw Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ, THEREFORE, I choose to declare that it did not happen.

If we are safely outside of the whirlpool, we say:  I can't see any proof that Joseph Smith saw Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ,  NEVERTHELESS, I will choose to embrace it with hope.


And the hecklers will say "That is blind faith".  Duh. ALL faith is blind by definition.
(I don't have time to belabor this point, but I hope you get it. Moving on...)

As all of you had better know by now, Alma continues teaching the Zoramites about faith by comparing it to a seed. If the seed is planted in our hearts, and we don't cast it out, and we nourish it, it will grow up into our own, personal "Tree of Life".  (Alma 32:28-43)

(Now we are getting to the point of the post where you are probably wondering where I am going with this. I understand.)

And now it gets difficult:  If someone we love is drowning in personal apostasy, what can we do to help them escape? How do we get the seed planted in their hearts so it can grow?

The way out of the whirlpool is through the restoration of faith. It isn't about bible-bashing, or arguing, or browbeating, or compelling someone to pull themselves out of the whirlpool. Compulsion does not work. You can't force-plant the seeds of faith. (ask any missionary, or parent.)

Then what works? Persuasion, long-suffering, gentleness, meekness, and love unfeigned. Oh, and kindness, too.  (D&C 121:41-42)

It is no coincidence that this very same Alma had previously rebelled, and had militantly pursued the believers.  He knew what he was talking about! He lived it. One of the things that helped Alma come to a knowledge of the truth, was that his father and members of the church were faithfully praying for him.

We can communicate the joy and blessings of the gospel by living it to the fullest, and we can teach if/when the Spirit says the time is right.

We can...
• Pray
• Serve
• Love
• Be an example
• Teach by the Spirit

•••Caution!  Don't get sucked into a whirlpool in an attempt to rescue someone that is already there. ('nuff said.)

What if we are the ones in the whirlpool? What do we need to begin our climb out?  We have to want to. Yes, it is that painfully simple. Sometimes we are comfortable in our apostasy.  Not much responsibility, lots of supportive friends, a feeling of adventure, two Saturdays every weekend.

Alma says that the way out all starts with desire: "...even if ye can do no more than desire to believe, let this desire work in you, even until ye believe in a manner that can give place for a portion of my words."  (Alma 32:27)

Desire. We have to want it. Tragically, some of us who lose our faith never desire to regain it - or when the desire starts to stir, our 'superior intellect', or our pride tamps it back down. That blasted agency gets in the way...

Sometimes the Lord helps us "want it". He knocked Alma silly. He sends crises that cause us to turn to God. Sometimes we create such a mess by ourselves that we begin to look for a way out.  Events like birth, deaths, and ordinances can cause us to re-evaluate our standing in the church and with God. But sometimes, no-matter-what, we refuse to turn and look.

Even so, it all begins with desire, which leads to faith.  Remember, apostasy is a crisis of faith.

You gotta want it.

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Real-life application:

Here is a conversation I had this past week with a reader named Chantelle. We've never met, but she is now my friend.  She shared an incredibly personal story of how she emerged from her own personal whirlpool of apostasy. I find it remarkably brave of her to share it, and she and I both hope that someone might benefit from her story.  This is a link to her blog.  (She's British.  That is so cool.)  Thank you Chantelle!

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Comment on Whirlpool of Spiritual Stupidity:

I have been down exactly this path myself. Not the same sin as you described in the scenario above, but it all happened in very much the same way. For a long while I honestly, hand on heart believed that it was not MY doing - I was simply clicking around looking for lesson material and BAM - there was a truckload of info I wasn't expecting. It drew me in and my testimony at the time seemed to shatter. Thankfully I was only inactive for a few months before pulling myself back together and have since managed to come back swinging and with what I now believe is an unshakeable faith and testimony.

I love how you said in a comment:

"Choosing not follow the Lord's counsel, choosing not to participate in the ordinances of the gospel (sacrament), not fulfilling stewardships, not paying tithes - I see all of these as sins of omission."

VERY true. As I said, I believed for a long time that what I went through wasn't my doing, but slowly (as I allowed myself to be humble and honest) came to realize that if I had been more diligent in scripture study, prayer, knowing the importance of following counsel and commandments... Whatever I came across either would not have made a difference to me if I read it, or I would simply have chosen to not read it. Crisis averted. Hindsight is a wonderful thing, is it not? :-)

Chantelle

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Dear Chantelle:

A couple days ago you wrote a comment on my "Whirlpool" post that just reached in and grabbed my heart.  The comment never got published, because I moderate after one day.  I held it back because I thought it was really powerful.

I was hoping to use your comment in my follow-up post, but wanted to check with you first. The main thing I hope to focus on is how the simple basics of daily prayer and scripture study keep us away from the edge of the whirlpool - and you explained that with your own personal experience (in hindsight)

If it is OK to use your comment, please let me know - I would be happy to name you, and give your blog a shout-out, or leave you completely anonymous - your call!

Also, I did have one question:  What triggered the return to activity?  How did you pull yourself out?  Was it an specific experience? An awareness of the absence of the Spirit? I know that some readers are in that whirlpool and can't see their way out - any advice would be helpful.

Sorry to dump this on you, but if you are going to leave fascinating comments on my blog - you are gonna have to pay!  ;)

Thanks,

-MMM-

---------------

Hi there!

You're more than welcome to use my comment in any way you please - I know

your blog has a wide readership and I hope it may be able to help someone

in some small way. If someone stumbles across your blog who is in a

similar situation it can help to know that others have been there, too! It

may be incredibly naive of me to say that but you just never know.

The way my husband (then boyfriend) and I returned to activity was a

combination of a lot of little things leading up to one big life changing

event. This is probably really simple to explain but I'm terribly good at

using 100 words when 10 would have sufficed so you may need to bear with

me...!

It's not really for me to explain my husbands actions so I'll leave him

out and just tell you as much as I can (as clearly as I can) about what

was going on with me.

I went inactive in October 2008 after coming across a lot of anti-Mormon

literature online. As I said in my last comment, in hindsight I never

would have given any of this  the time of day (or it wouldn't have

effected me as it dad) if I'd been more diligent in my prayers and

scripture study - two very simple things but oh, SO important.

For a couple of months things felt a little strange, but at the time I put

that down to just settling into a new routine and a change of direction

(in hindsight that was the absence of the spirit, but I didn't realize

when going through it). At this time I very rarely prayed and didn't touch

my scriptures once. I was upset and angry at the church, I felt betrayed,

and I didn't really want a whole lot to do with it.

After a little more time passed and I allowed myself to think more

rationally about the whole situation I started having niggling doubts that

maybe - just maybe - I had made a very stupid, and very rash decision. I

remember times when I would suddenly start singing hymns as I was doing

housework or I'd have a fleeting memory of what I'd said during a

testimony meeting or I'd remember something that stood out to me during

scripture study... Just small things, but they made a big impression. Why

was I feeling this way? And why were these things still so dear to me? Why

had I begun to yearn for something that I was still almost certain was not

true?

This started to happen with more frequency and by the time February rolled

around I was certain that I'd made a mistake, and I'd managed to work

through around 85% of the issues that had driven me away in the first

place. I'm absolutely certain that these moments were my Heavenly Father

trying to reach out to me and I am SO grateful that even though I turned

my back on him, he was completely unreasonable and carried on loving me

and wanting me anyway!

I stopped wrestling with myself and trying to intellectualize every little

detail and just resolved to HAVE FAITH and trust what I felt in my heart,

and what I knew my spirit resonated with. As soon as I did that, I felt

the floodgates open and I fell to my knees - thank goodness I was home at

the time!! Ha! I will never forget how I felt and what I said - I prayed

like I have never prayed before or since. My renewed testimony for the

church and the spirit it brought with it was like a fire enveloping me. It

was wonderful, and it is so amazing to be humbled in such a way.

I remember around this time driving in my car and it was the first time

I'd REALLY gained a testimony of modern-day Prophets. It all suddenly

clicked how absolutely AMAZING it was that we have a Prophet on the earth.

A PROPHET! A messenger of God! Here! Today! I had to pull the car over, I

was in tears and couldn't see to drive... Heavenly Father was very good to

me during those months, and my testimony grew quicker and stronger than it

ever had before that point.

... But I'd walked out months before in such a blaze of glory it took a

while longer for me to get the guts to say anything to anyone about how I

was feeling. I've known others to feel the same way, and it's true when

people say that the first step is often the hardest. But I got a great big

push in the right direction when my husband proposed and we got engaged in

the April. Suddenly I saw myself five-ten years from that point with

children... That got me thinking about our future family and what was

REALLY important. What we really NEEDED in our lives. What we wanted to

be.

So - we took the plunge. We prioritized, stopped being stubborn and

listened to our hearts rather than our heads. And it led us home. And you

can bet there's nothing that can EVER tear me away again.

... And you can bet I try my hardest never to ease up on my prayer and

scripture study nowadays! It's WAY too important. I really think people

underestimate the power and worth of these two little things, and it's

massively dangerous to think that way. They keep me close to my Heavenly

Father, they ensure I have the constant companionship of the Spirit and

they reassure me that I am on the right track.

The funny thing is, now I honestly cannot remember the details of what

drove me away in the first place. My testimony, my church membership and

all that comes with it is so VERY precious to me that I cannot imagine why

on earth I was ever tempted to give it up. It's like it was a whole other

person in another life. The adversary is indeed sneaky and he WILL hit you

where you are weakest, often without you realizing until it is too late.

Sorry - I told you I was good at being "wordy"! I'm not sure how much or

how little of the above you will need or want to use, but feel free to use

any of it however you see fit.

I know your post will be a huge help to anyone currently struggling with

this and I pray that I may be able to assist in any small way.

If you need any more info - please let me know.

Take care,

Chantelle

PS. If anyone gets in touch with you that is in a similar situation and

needs someone to talk to, I'm more than happy to help.

------

Carpe Donutum

I knew it was going to be a busy morning, with lots of chores to do. So I ran over to the grocery store to start the day right:. To get a dozen donutes - and a gallon of chocolate milk - because chocolate milk has vitamin D and protein.  (Gotta keep the family healthy!) When I got to the counter, I didn't recognize the place. I don't know what happened during the night, but the normally normal baker went nuts.

Oreo covered donuts,
German chocolate donuts,
Peanut butter donuts,
"Everything" donuts with coconut, nuts, sprinkles etc.

The generic lineup was still there, but this new, eclectic batch had been added to the mix.  And right in the middle, shining like a beacon in a dark night, was this: A bacon donut. A bacon beacon.

It was a regular raised donut with maple icing, topped with pieces of bacon. I had to get one, just because I'm a man.

Guess what?  It worked.  Somehow the bacon with the maple worked in the same way that pancakes and syrup work with a side of bacon.  I liked it.  My only criticism is that the bacon needed to be rendered down a little more for a better textural contrast. (So I watch "Chopped" - what of it?)

So there you go.  Next time you see a bacon donut, know that it has been pre-approved by MMM.

Happy Saturday!

Whirlpool Avoidance or Thank You, Captain Obvious

Monday I posted some thoughts regarding the process of sliding into personal apostasy. (Here) I want to thank you for participating with your comments. The comments ran the gamut from agreement and support to disagreement and even a touch of hostility (that I deleted.) It is surely a sensitive subject, and the point was not to condemn any individual - but to explore how the process of de-conversion happens.


The illustration I used is just one "version" of how someone's testimony can slip away. "Ralph" represented no single person, but I have personally witnessed every element in the narrative.  If your names happens to be Ralph, I apologize for using your name. I don't even know you.


Now that we have that taken care of...


The main premise of the Whirlpool of Spiritual Stupidity is simply this:  When we divorce ourselves from the companionship of the Holy Ghost, we lose our best source of inspiration to guide us in making wise choices. That's it.
Whirlpool avoidance comes in two parts.  1) How do we stay out of the whirlpool? and 2) If we find ourselves in the whirlpool, how do we get out?  Right now, I'm looking at the first part.


How do we stay out of the whirlpool?  That is where Captain Obvious comes in. Here is a story that President Packer and President Hinckley both told. You have probably heard it over and over again. You know why? Because it is one of the most important stories you will ever hear. I'm serious. So read it anyway. Humor me.


A man was interviewing new drivers for his transportation company. The route was very dangerous and went along several steep cliffs through a mountain pass. The interviewer asked each man how close he could safely drive near the edge of the cliff. The first man responded, “I could drive within six inches of the edge.” The second man responded, “I could drive within two inches of the edge.” The third man responded, “I would stay as far away from the edge of the cliff as I possibly could.”  The third man got the job.    (John Bytheway describes this problem as trying to determine "How bad can I be?")


President Hinckley said, "You know when you are walking on dangerous ground, when it is so easy to stumble and slide into the pit of transgression. I plead with you to be careful, to stand safely back from the cliff of sin over which it is so easy to fall."  (Link here) 



The "cliff" that the story, and President Hinckley, refer to can be different for each of us.  For some, like Ralph, it is pornography, for others it might be participating in anti-Mormon websites or criticizing the brethren, for others it might be Word of Wisdom issues. The cliff can be as common as contention or unkindness, but still highly personalized. 


Step 1:  Avoid Sin.   No, really. That's not possible?  Oh, that's right. All of us flirt with the whirlpool because we don't live perfect lives - we all sin. Some of us spectacularly. And so we all fall short of the glory of God. (Romans 3:23) That means that avoiding sin isn't going to cut it. So let's go deeper...



This week our family has been reading in Alma about the Zoramites - an apostate group of Nephites. Alma and his mighty band of missionaries went to try and bring them back into the fold (Alma 31) The way the Zoramites were described shows an insight as to how they got there.



“But they had fallen into great errors, for they would not observe to keep the commandments of God, and his statutes, according to the law of Moses. Neither would they observe the performances of the church, to continue in prayer and supplication to God daily, that they might not enter into temptation.” (Alma 31:9-10)


Note how the Zoramites got into "great errors" (or the whirlpool) - they had:
• Stopped keeping the commandments.
• Stopped participating in the ordinances of the Church.
• Stopped praying daily


Elder Dallin Oaks asked a question similar to what we are discussing when he asked, "How can we have the Spirit of the Lord to guide our choices and keep us on the path?"  He went on to answer his own question by saying,


"We need to qualify for the cleansing power of the Atonement of Jesus Christ. We do this by keeping His commandment to come to Him with a broken heart and a contrite spirit and in that wonderful weekly meeting partake of the emblems of the sacrament and make the covenants that qualify us for the precious promise that we will always have His Spirit to be with us." (Sacrament Meeting and the Sacrament) Amazing, life-altering talk.


The beauty and genius of the weekly ordinance of the sacrament is that if we are repenting and renewing every week, it is almost impossible to get too far off course - because we can keep the Spirit with us. Daily repentance and weekly renewal is as close to a whirlpool avoidance guarantee that you can get.


Step 2: Take the Sacrament Weekly, and Correctly


Just a few weeks ago, President Uchtdorf spoke to the Priesthood holders in General Conference. He said,"Brethren, I invite you to consider the words spoken by the servants of God this weekend. Then get on your knees. Ask God, our Heavenly Father, to enlighten your mind and touch your heart. Plead with God for guidance in your daily lives, in your Church responsibilities, and in your specific challenges at this time. Follow the promptings of the Spirit—do not delay. If you do all this, I promise that the Lord will not leave you to walk alone." (The Why of Priesthood Service)


What he is describing is how prayer helps us from becoming Spiritually Stupid. Notice that the blessings of taking the sacrament are the same as daily prayer:  Companionship of the Spirit.



Step 3: Pray Daily, and Correctly



Next, President James E. Faust said, "Daily scripture study turns on the light of our spiritual perception and opens our understandings to further knowledge." (Put Light in Your Life)


Step 4: Daily Scripture Study (Bonus step)



Let's review! Here are four steps that help s make sure we do not slide into the whirlpool. I know how you must be feeling - you wouldn't expect to find such new and exciting doctrine on a blog such as mine.


Step 1: Avoid Sin
Step 2: Take the Sacrament Weekly, and Correctly
Step 3: Pray Daily, and Correctly
Step 4: Daily Scripture Study (Bonus step)

Thank you, Captain Obvious! Simple! You've heard it a thousand times - and you will notice that I didn't need to explain any of this, because prophets with actual authority to speak for God have already have said it so well. All four of these steps aim for the same result:  Keeping the Spirit with us to direct our lives. Simple!


Remember that just because something is simple does not make it is not challenging.  For example the concept of "burn more calories than you consume" is a simple concept, but many of us still struggle with it.  Why? Because we are human. (Most of the time.)

In all seriousness - the simple truth, as taught by the Lord and His Prophets on the earth is this: If we do these things, the Holy Ghost will be in our hearts, and keep us at a safe distance from the whirlpool.  If the whirlpool comes after us, or we start to get caught in it's grasp, we will have the strength to repent, and get to safety.


A couple additional thoughts: If we have the Holy Ghost with us, we do not leave the Church. We do not criticize the leaders of the Church. We are not on a quest to "reform" some aspect of the Church.  The Spirit will not lead us to do those things. So it follows that if we find ourselves doing those things, we are already in the whirlpool. Spiritual Stupidity has already set in.

In the last General Conference, Elder Wilford W. Anderson of the Seventy said this:

"I am a witness of the miraculous process of spiritual rebirth. Those who exercise faith in Christ by obeying His commandments, repenting of their sins, earnestly entering into the covenant of baptism, and then renewing that covenant weekly will receive the purifying power of the Holy Ghost unto the remission of their sins. They will experience and retain a mighty change of heart and will “have no more disposition to do evil, but to do good continually."  (Receiving and Retaining a Might Change)

Isn't that what we are after?

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What happens if we fail to heed this counsel, and find ourselves deep down in the whirlpool? Is there a way out? Is there hope? The answer is and emphatic YES. But the explanation will require yet another post.  Watch for it.  I will also be sharing one MMM reader's story about her descent into the whirlpool, and what became of her. You don't want to miss it.

The World's Greatest Excuse

It pains me to inform you that I have yet to finish the "Whirlpool" followup post. I could offer the reason in quiz form:

a) I have been spending quality time with the family.
b) My EC gave an FHE lesson about spending less time using technology.
c) Basketball
d) All of the above
e) None of the above.

Instead, I will just offer this:  "Something suddenly came up."

That's all. Even though the answer was "d) All of the above", I'm sticking with "Something suddenly came up".  Why? you may ask. Because "SSCU" is the catch-all, best-ever excuse to get out of anything. And if you need more convincing - all you need to know is that Greg Brady taught these all powerful exculpatory words to Marcia.    'nuff said.

To show you the proper usage of the SSCU phrase, I have included an short video presentation. It is so good on so many levels. Sure, it is 9 minutes long, but I wouldn't expect you to watch it unless it had my full endorsement.

While viewing, please keep in mind the following:

• The highlight of the clip is not - as commonly believed - Marcia getting hit in the face with a football.  As entertaining as that may be, the real focus should be on Jan's pants.

• The young man playing Doug Simpson does not have even half the acting skills as Greg's "Oscar-worthy" right eyebrow.

• This was 1973. I was 11. Marcia Brady was the most beautiful woman in the world in 1973.  Looking back, even I must admit that her hair could have used a little trim.

• When Marcia is on the phone, that curly thing coming out the end is called a "cord".

• Remember, this was Prime-time television back then. 7:00pm. Yes, like "The Office" or "How I met Your Mother".

• The most unrealistic part of this clip was not that Robert Reed was playing a straight, married man, but that Marica went for a ride in Doug's convertible without her purse. Like that's gonna happen.

• If I weren't writing this mindless drivel, I could have finished my important post by now.

• Yes, this clip could be used for an FHE lesson.


You are most welcome!

Prayer on the Go

Note:  I am delaying my promised followup to the "Whirlpool of Spiritual Stupidity", so I can get it right.

Sorry about the delay. (Especially to Robyn. Sheesh!)

Until then, I have this inspirational post for you to ponder.

Special Musical Number

I saw in the news that a church in Florida has begun offering to pray with people at a drive-through window. Nice! Jammie-time Church!  Apparently, Drive-thru Prayer Service is held on Friday afternoons, and they are willing to pray with you about any issue - big or small. (If I were to pray in my car, my first prayer would be that gas prices would go down.) You've gotta admit -  that's a new idea. (FYI, turns out it was not an LDS ward)

My first reaction was to say that I know some single's ward bishops that could really use this, but then I realized that saying that would be really inappropriate. So I'm not going to.

So instead, I guess I have to give those ministers some credit for creatively serving their congregation.

Personally, I'm a little frustrated because I can't even get the guy at Wendy's drive-thru to bless my food before he hands me the bag.


Link to original story

"The Whirlpool of Spiritual Stupidity"

I am moving forward with the assumption that you spend some time in the Book of Mormon every day.  Right? Since you are so well-versed in it's teachings, it will come to no surprise when I make the following observation:

It is amazing how quickly a group of people can go from good to bad, and bad to good. Sometimes it takes several generations to make the "shift", but often it is only a matter of a few years. Remarkably fast.  Mormon probably felt like he was editing a tennis match as the pendulum of righteousness swung back and forth.

What about individuals? Have you ever had the joy of knowing someone whose life swung from bad to good in the blink of an eye?  I have. I have seen miraculous conversions where - through the gospel - the Lord heals and blesses a penitent soul's life with lightening speed. The old man is cast off, only to be replaced by the new man.   It is understandable that a conversion from bad to good can happen so quickly, because God has power, and mercy, and He can apply both when he sees fit.

But what about when it goes the other direction?  Have you ever known anyone who is strong in the faith, has a testimony, and then - almost suddenly - they are out of the church, lost in the wilderness, or turning against the church?

I have seen that too, and it is as heartbreaking as a conversion is joyful. Sadly, personal apostasy can happen with the same blinding speed as a conversion. One minute they seem to be doing OK, the next you can't even believe you are talking to the same person.

How?  To explain, I would like to introduce you to "The Whirlpool of Spiritual Stupidity".

Before we understand the "WoSS", we need to recall a few of important gospel principles:

1) When we are baptized, we are baptized by water and by fire - the Holy Ghost is the fire that cleanses us from our sins. (D&C 33:11 & Moroni 6:4)

2) The Holy Ghost can teach us the truth of all things. (Moroni 10:5)

3) The Holy Ghost can guide our decision-making process. (2 Nephi 32:5, D&C 11:12)

4) The Holy Ghost will not stay with an unclean person. (Alma 7:21)

5) They Holy Ghost will withdraw from an unrepentant person. (D&C 121:37)

6) Without the Holy Ghost, we are left to our own devices - and are cursed. (2 Nephi 28:31)

Back to the "Whirlpool of Spiritual Stupidity"...

We are confronted by decisions each and every day. Some not so important: What flavor of Pop-Tart should I have for breakfast?, and important decisions: Who should I marry? Where should I go to school?  What career path should I take?

The Lord has blessed us with a companion to help us make wise choices. When we make choices in accordance with the promptings of the Holy Ghost, we will choose well. If we do not consult with the Holy Ghost, we may or may not choose well. That is where the WoSS kick in.
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Worst-case Case study:

Ralph comes home from serving two years as a valiant full-time missionary. He did a great job, was faithful and obedient in all things.  After he gets home, he eases back into the normal collegiate life - staying up late, playing video games, surfing the web, etc.  Things like scripture study and prayer begin to fade from priority. Unknowingly, he is drifting closer to the whirlpool.

One day Ralph happens upon a website that features a steamy link. He is curious, so he clicks. Before he knows it, two hours have gone by, and Ralph has exposed himself to some rough pornography. He is now below the edge of the whirlpool.

The Spirit flees.

Later that night, with the Spirit gone, the only voice he hears is that of the adversary. "For the evil spirit teacheth not a man to pray, but teacheth him that he must not pray." (2 Nephi 32:8) So Ralph goes to bed feeling guilty - no prayers - no repentance.

The next day, as Ralph finds himself at the computer again - now in a weakened spiritual state - he brushes off the prompting to stay away, and returns to the pornography. Several days go by, and the voice of the Spirit gets easier and easier to ignore. Without prayer, and without promptings of the Spirit, Ralph gets pulled farther and farther down the whirlpool.  He ignores the pleadings of the Spirit to stop, to repent. With amazing speed, Ralph is now walking through life devoid of the Spirit. He is becoming spiritually stupid - or stupid to the things of the Spirit. He is on his own - or at least he thinks he is - but the adversary has been willing to stick around, because he still has a lot to say - and the adversary eventually talks him into immoral behavior - beyond just looking at it on the computer.  Deeper and deeper.

Remember, Ralph is in the middle of what Elder Robert D. Hales called the "Decade of Decision", but he is trying to make his way through those decisions without the help of the Spirit. Ralph is now deep enough into the whirlpool that he is too embarrassed to do anything about it - it would break his mother's heart - and he's not about to go see the bishop - so he just keeps moving forward. Stupidly.

Now come the big decisions:  Where shall I go to school?  What shall I study?  Who shall I marry?  Where should we live? What job should I take?  But Ralph is spiritually stupid. He has put himself in the dangerous situation of having to make all these decisions without the help of the God that loves him. So one of two things happens: 1) He avoids making those decisions- it is easier to sit in the basement and play video games. Or 2) He goes on, pretending to be what he is not, and making the best of it, while bearing the burden of sin and the associated guilt.

Ralph meets a great girl, falls in love, decides to marry her. He never bothers to ask God if she's the right one - he has stopped asking things by now, because he knows he doesn't deserve an answer. His new bride loves him - she is excited to find her RM, oblivious to the fact that he is unworthy to take her to the temple to fulfill her lifelong dream.

But he takes her to the temple anyway. A little lie here, a little lie there.  Deeper and deeper.

So the young couple begins their new life together - one in sin, the other unaware. Both are unaware that the sealing - the marriage they waited their whole lives for - was not sealed by the Spirit, and is void before God. (D&C 132:7)

Ralph's wife quietly wonders why her husband complains about going to church, why he refuses to lead the family in scripture study and FHE. Then she wonders a little more loudly. Why won't he take me back to the temple?

They are not happy - because "happiness in family life is most likely to be achieved when founded upon the teachings of the Lord Jesus Christ", etc.  (The Family: A Proclamation to the World)  The strains begin to show in the marriage, and the cracks begin to appear.

Deep down in the whirlpool, Ralph tells himself that it wasn't supposed to be like this. His wife's nagging and guilt make him miserable - and if it weren't for the baggage the church loads on him, things would be a lot better. It's the Church's fault! Those unrealistic expectations are causing the problems in his marriage, and in his life.  The adversary is quick to agree, and lets him know that it is not his fault, and that he is not alone.

Ralph soon discovers that there are thousands of people online that are just like him! He has found a home with other people - people unhappy with the Church, and the gospel - loud people who think that the Church can't possibly be true, or it wouldn't be so oppressive, and make them feel so bad about themselves.  And it follows that if the Church isn't true, then Joseph Smith must not have been a prophet...Right?   And the downward spiral continues...

And thus we see that the devil will not support his children at the last day, but doth speedily drag them down to hell." (Alma 30:60)

There is a lot of spiritually stupid company at the bottom of the whirlpool.

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A couple of finer points:

Am I making an assertion that sin precedes apostasy?  Yes.

How? Plain and simple:  People who have the Spirit don't leave the Church. Period.

Can it really happen like it did to Ralph?  Sadly, yes. It is very common, and very tragic.

Are you asserting that much of the unhappiness in life, and relationships, can be directly traced to unresolved sin? Yes.

Do you deserve Uchtdorf's Hammer?  No, I am just explaining how it works. I'm not condemning any specific person.

Can pornography really be that dangerous to priesthood holders? Yes. So can many other things that offend the Spirit. This example is why pornography is such an effective weapon. Offend the Spirit - then destroy the man.

What are some of those other things?  Contention, criticism of leaders, ingratitude, Word of Wisdom issues, gambling, idleness, etc.

Is there a way to keep from getting sucked into the whirlpool, or a way to get out once you are deep inside?  Yes - and I will discuss that part later - because there is hope.

Stay tuned...

Command or Consequence? Mosiah 4

Today many of us are teaching or learning about King Benjamin's teachings in Mosiah 4. (Book of Mormon).  There is a verse in that chapter that I think deserves a closer look - and if you will bear with me and read 7 verses, it will make more sense.  Here they are:

Mosiah 4:10 And again, believe that ye must repent of your sins and forsake them, and humble yourselves before God; and ask in sincerity of heart that he would forgive you; and now, if you believe all these things see that ye do them.

11 And again I say unto you as I have said before, that as ye have come to the knowledge of the glory of God, or if ye have known of his goodness and have tasted of his love, and have received a remission of your sins, which causeth such exceedingly great joy in your souls, even so I would that ye should remember, and always retain in remembrance, the greatness of God, and your own nothingness, and his goodness and long-suffering towards you, unworthy creatures, and humble yourselves even in the depths of humility, calling on the name of the Lord daily, and standing steadfastly in the faith of that which is to come, which was spoken by the mouth of the angel.

12 And behold, I say unto you that if ye do this ye shall always rejoice, and be filled with the love of God, and always retain a remission of your sins; and ye shall grow in the knowledge of the glory of him that created you, or in the knowledge of that which is just and true.

13 And ye will not have a mind to injure one another, but to live peaceably, and to render to every man according to that which is his due.

14 And ye will not suffer your children that they go hungry, or naked; neither will ye suffer that they transgress the laws of God, and fight and quarrel one with another, and serve the devil, who is the master of sin, or who is the evil spirit which hath been spoken of by our fathers, he being an enemy to all righteousness.

15 But ye will teach them to walk in the ways of truth and soberness; ye will teach them to love one another, and to serve one another.

16 And also, ye yourselves will succor those that stand in need of your succor; ye will administer of your substance unto him that standeth in need; and ye will not suffer that the beggar putteth up his petition to you in vain, and turn him out to perish.

Quick summary:  In verses 10-11, Mosiah gives a great explanation of what we need to do to get started on "the path".  (it's OK if the sacrament prayers come to mind)

Humble

Repent and forsake sins

Remission of Sins

Retain in remembrance

Daily prayer

In verses 12-16, he gives us a list of other things we need to work on.

Retain remission of sins

Grow in knowledge of God and truth

Don't injure one another

Don't let children go hungry or naked, or quarrel and be disobedient to commandments

Teach your children

Be charitable towards others

Give of your possessions to the poor

So that is a pretty big list. But are we being told to do those things, or are those things a result of living a clean Spirit filled life? Remember, verses 10-11 are the pattern to become clean and have the Spirit with us.  Now read verse 12 again, and look at the word "IF".

12 And behold, I say unto you that if ye do this ye shall always rejoice, and be filled with the love of God, and always retain a remission of your sins; and ye shall grow in the knowledge of the glory of him that created you, or in the knowledge of that which is just and true.

Can it be that the counsel listed in 12-16 isn't really counsel at all?  Or is it the result of how we are led to behave if the Spirit is directing our lives, and we have received knowledge of what is good and true?

Remember when Enos repented? As soon as he knew he was forgiven, his heart turned to his brethren. Doesn't it follow that as we live cleanly, the Spirit will guide us to do that "checklist" provided by King Benjamin?

You'll note that King Benjamin never talks in a "Thou shalt not" in this section he says "you will not".

Maybe the focus needs to be more on keeping clean, and keeping the Spirit in our lives, and less about the checklist.

Just a thought - comments welcome.