To my four sons:
I have great hopes and dreams for each of you. One day, I hope you will all find yourselves married to a wonderful EC. To help preserve that future union, I have begun a list that will bless your lives. It is ever-growing, and comes from knowledge gained by my own experience. If you will remember these 10 things, you will experience much more joy in your marriages and improve your odds of living a happy, peaceful life.
Never say the any of the following to your wife:
• You are overreacting.
• Is dinner ready yet?
• What's the Relief Society budget for magnets?
• What did you do all day?
• It's not a big deal.
• You can do it - just grab a screwdriver...
• It's not like I don't wear the same shoes to church every Sunday.
• Can't it wait until the game's over?
• Your hair looks great. (If you didn't really look)
• You sound like your mom.
Now I know that I have only listed ten, and there are many, many more. I'm sure my readers will submit others that will be of great value. Remember that this knowledge was gained by trials and tribulations of those who went before. Take it to heart, and one day, you will thank me.
Love,
Dad
#1 in my book..."Are you just about ready yet?" This has caused a lot of unnecessary anger. And I get ready faster than him!
ReplyDeletePretty good list, I'd say. You're learning. ;)
ReplyDeleteGreat list! My additions:
ReplyDelete*What do we have to talk about?
*By the way, I'm going to do this... (without discussing it first)
*That's not logical!
But, you need to do a post of things you SHOULD say. :)
Oh! And:
ReplyDelete*Are you on your period?
or
*Do you start your period next week?
Cheryl: Good idea - I will do a post of things you SHOULD say to your wife. Right after I write a list for my daughter of things wives shouldn't say to their husbands.
ReplyDeleteThat one is gonna be good!
ReplyDeletehow about, "that's not how my mom cooks/cleans/makes..."
ReplyDeleteDeb: Sorry - I've had no experience with that one - my wife can cook circles around my M-I-L.
ReplyDeleteHow about just the "My mom did it this way . . ." and insert whatever you want.
ReplyDeleteIs it OK if I blah blah blah? Oh well I already said I would.
ReplyDeleteA few weeks ago as we were rushing to get us and our 6 kids ready for 9 am church, my EC asked me if she looked nice? In a rush I said, "yeah, you look nice. Let's go." She snapped, "only nice?" I walked right into that one and paid for it the rest of the day.
ReplyDeleteWe have an understanding: if it is important, I have to say, "hey I need your attention because this is important!" because truly, a lot of what I say is prattle. :)I admit that.
ReplyDeleteDon't talk about your wife on a blog without painting her in the most favorable light.
ReplyDeleteThat's good. Train 'em up right!
ReplyDelete=)
Here's a trick my husband uses when he wants to say something that might set me off...he used it last night in fact...He says, "Permission to speak freely?" It works. I agree not to get mad and he gets to say what he wants...but there's a very brief window on that! :)
ReplyDeleteFor you info: This post has been vetted and cleared for posting by my EC. (Thankfully, she has a sense of humor)
ReplyDeleteYou ARE a wise man.
ReplyDeleteAwesome. Your posts make me smile. :)
ReplyDeleteRS magnet budget...that's hilarious.
ReplyDeleteCan't wait for what wives shouldn't say to their husbands....that'll be funny...and probably enlightening. ; )
Loved Sharline's too...(1st commenter)
When visiting her parents, never be the one to say its time to go.
ReplyDelete"just a minute! I need to get this blog piece finished."
ReplyDeleteyou're killing me smalls!
ReplyDeleteThat's a great start! Are you writing a how-to/how-not-to book?
ReplyDeleteSandy
"I really think you should grease that cookie sheet even though the recipe doesn't call for it. Let's call my Mom and ask."
ReplyDeleteIn the interest of helping the next generation I will submit this:
ReplyDeleteDon't ask your wife when she is in labor with any FOML "How long do you think you will be?" My poor husband is still living that down eight children later!
"Well, no wonder; you didn't follow the recipe."
ReplyDeleteGreat list! Next, have them memorize the list in this song:
ReplyDeletehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iK2OakMoW_c
You're welcome. (And if the song "Delilah," also by Tim Hawkins, is in the sidebar, click that, too.)
JWW