You know, I could probably give you the "Senior Discount".
I was rendered speechless - which for me is a rarity. I said no thank you (?) and staggered off to find my wife.
I knew that this question would be coming - one day - but not yet. Sure, last month there had been some colossal mistake at the "American Associate of Retired Persons" (AARP) offices, when, through some complex computer glitch I was accidentally sent a membership card application. I'm sure it happens all the time, and I don't judge them.
But face to face? Sure, the girl was young, and trying to be polite, but to hit me with the Senior Discount? I will gladly accept any and all Senior Discounts when the time is right - but...
I'm 49!
After I caught my breath from the suckerpunch, I explained to my EC what had happened. Did I get sympathy, or understanding? No. Did she even try and alleviate my pain with humor? No.
She simply said, "Maybe it's because you are wearing your peepers down on your nose like that."
Of course! How silly of me. It was the glasses all along. I felt much better knowing that this young lady had no idea of her gaffe.
I also felt much better after my wife called my reading glasses "peepers".
Maybe I could get her an AARP card.
.
I offer my sincere empathy... but mostly because this post comes just days after noticing the very first hint of age spots on my hands (and I haven't even hit 40 yet). Aging happens to the best of us, I suppose. Maybe senior discounts are intended to soften the blow. *defeated sigh
ReplyDeleteI'm a just a mere four years behind you and as far as I'm concerned, there's no other way to wear those "peepers." Mine proudly sit down on my nose the same way. Of course, that's over the bi-focal contact lenses.
ReplyDeleteI've been getting hearing aid ads in the mail for five years now. I don't know why "the man" thinks I's so old. Maybe I really am getting old. I finally gave in and bought a pair of magnified reading glasses so I don't have to hold my scriptures 4 feet away from my face in order to read in the morning.
ReplyDeleteI've been getting AARP cards in the mail for years and I'm 33. Maybe they are just hoping if they send it to everyone, someone will reply.
ReplyDeleteAck! My condolences.
ReplyDeleteI keep hearing those ads that say "if your are 50 or over ..." and I tell myself not to worry 'cause I'm not 50 (well, at least not for a few more months). So far no one's offered me the senior discount. I'll probably cry. Meanwhile, my reading glasses are always perched on the tip of my nose. I can't read without them, but I can't look at people with them. Getting older is not for sissies.
ReplyDeleteThe first (and only, so far) Senior Discount I received was a couple of years ago. I was 50 (or nearly so -- within a month) and was buying lunch at a Subway Sandwich shop in a little town in Arizona. The girl gave me the discount before I knew what was happening. I noticed it on the receipt on my way out. I was glad my grey hair was valued at about a buck and a half...
ReplyDeleteStill haven't succumbed to AARP's invitations to join.
I recently applied for some credit at an appliance store. The clerk filled out the application for me and marked my age as the "45-50" category. I'm only 43!! I was eternally offended!
ReplyDeleteJenny in NC
They other day at the store the clerk said "how are you today young lady?" I think I blushed. If you tipped check out clerks, his would have doubled. I smiled and said I don't remember the last time anyone called me that. (I'm closer to 40 than 30) It's funny how a simple comment can affect our day. My point is.....do you want to be 20? my guess is no. I believe your best years are still ahead of you, no matter your age. Aren't you a frugal guy? Enjoy the discount. Just a little advice from a younger, less wise person.
ReplyDeleteOh Father Dearest. Good thing you have so many wonderful FOMLs that will be able to take care of you in your old age.
ReplyDeleteIt was my 23rd birthday. I went out to check the mail, expecting the annual birthday card from my grandma that I have gotten on schedule since the beginning of time. There sitting on top w the usual junk mail between my intent to graduate nursing school form and the card was an invite, addressed to me, from the AARP urging me to join. I wasn't sure weather to laugh or cry
ReplyDeleteA discount is a discount. I would have taken it, but I'm cheap.
ReplyDelete